Monday, March 10, 2014

Found this in my drafts folder from 2010: we went to beach, and I don't mean the river or a lake!

So yesterday morning, we're sitting in the living room reading, when out of the blue the husband says, "Let's go to the beach",
me: "well I was planning on heading over to the river later",
him: "no, I mean the ocean".... what?!
me: "but it's so far away"
him: "where's you're sense of adventure?"
I point at the kids.. "gone"

so about 5 minutes go by, and I say "Let's go tot he beach!" so we decide to head to hampton beach in NH. we call around to people to see if anyone wants to go. perfect. Trevor is coming with!

The weather was absolutely perfect! and the kids we amazingly good in the car. Evan had a blast, and even the baby seemed to enjoy himself! of course Jay doesn't really take pictures, so I grabbed a couple, which I'll download and add when I get to the other computer. we left at like noon and didn't make it home until 10-something. but we took the long way home on 101 in NH, and had dinner in Keene. it was about 2.5 hours there. arrived at 2:30 ish. We
spent atleast 2 hours at the beach, and then headed back. Man I sure miss living close to the beach, especially one is warmer, and you don't have to get out b/c your numb (atleast at this point in the summer).

maybe today we'll head over the the river for swimming or something. who knows.

speaking of the river, I took evan swimming there on friday after work. Jay was exhausted, and the baby was sleeping, so it was just me and the Evster. While we were having a good time in the water, and little boy, about 2 years old, goes up to our stuff at the beach and started playing with evan's toys. I look around, no parents in sight? wtf? it wasn't a big deal that he came over to play, but where were his parents. Then the lifeguard goes over and tries to tell him that they belong to us, but he still wanted to play. So i asked Evan if he wanted to go play in the sand with that little boy and he said okay.

I ask the lifeguard where his parents are, she shruged and said, "He doesn't speak English". um, ok. So here is when I bust out my Spanish, "Adonde estan tu Mama o Papa?" his response, "el carro" and points to the car at the end of the row about 50 feet away. I said to the lifeguard that he says his parents are in the car, and she said she hadn't seem them in over an hour. I look over and sure enough there were some people in the car, but who really knew if they were his parents or not. So we play for a while in the sand, and I keep looking over at the car, they're not even watching, and I see them playing with the baby. I"m getting annoyed at point. but then his older siblings came over to play too. The little boy's name is Michael. They were supposed to be watching him. ahh. Even so, if they were supposed to be watching him, then watch him, don't be down the other side of the beach. and the oldest was about 11 or so. It made me angry. You just don't leave a 2 year old to himself at the beach. But I felt like it wasn't my place to go over and bitch at the parents because the lifeguard didn't say anything to them... And my spanish was not even close to good enough to start up a conversation about how they shouldn't leave their 2-year-old near the water. Especially without a life jacket on the kid. Especially after knowing someone who just lost his son b/c he drowned at a public facility during a lifeguard change.

The poor kids diaper had fallen off too. and he was trying to hold it on, when I had come out of the water the first time. It was full of water, poor kid.

Friday, March 7, 2014

Forgot to Mention

I forgot to mention a couple months ago I figured out how to add in my old posts from my previous blogs, so you can now go into my archives way back to 2004 when i started blogging. Thought you'd like to know. No need to keep the link to my old blog anymore. I maybe have even deleted it. I don't' remember

Speech Patterns

Where I currently live in my state is fairly different than where I grew up. Ocean vs. no ocean, tourists vs. no tourists, cranberry bogs vs. traditional farms, mountains vs sandy shores and speech vs speech.

I like to think that I'm pretty good at distinguishing the different dialects of Massachusetts, and other dialects of the English language in general. I can almost always hear differences even if I don't have a specific region to pin it to. In an area as small as Massachusetts is, we have quite a few dialects which are described quite well here.

I grew up in where I affectionately refer to as, "the armpit of the cape", mainland side.
First a bit of learning: Most commonly people only associate The Cape (anyone local to, I'd say New England, refers to Cape Cod, as 'The Cape'. As in, "We're going to the Cape this weekend". Yes we have other capes, such as Cape Ann, but Cape Cod is the largest, and most common of them as a vacation destination) as being the part of the state solely east of the canal. While, yes, that is the main part of The Cape, geographically speaking, there is "mainland" areas are also included as a part of it's region including the towns of Bourne, Sagamore, and parts of Wareham. When they put in the Canal over 100 years ago, it created a visual border on maps which is why if I say I'm from The Cape, people tend to disagree with them once I tell them the part of the town from which I grew up. It's a battle I have resigned to by simple saying, "I grew up down by the Cape".
found here: http://wheelsms.wordpress.com

For more than 15 years I have lived, "out west" to a part of the state often not even on the radar of many of the people who live inside the I-495 belt that goes north/south outside of the Boston suburbs. Pictured is a funny, yet scarily accurate depiction of my area. HA! Other funny maps, poke of of the western area as but referencing that dragons live here or just fill it with several large ????? because as weird as it sounds, having had grown up in SE Mass, I had NO IDEA what lie west of 495. Swear to God. I knew the shape of the state of course, and knew that the Appalachians went through here, but had no idea about the Connecticut River, the large amounts of farm country, and streets wide enough for 2 cars to drive down at the same time.. oh my gosh! A wide Main Street, big enough for cars to park on, AND drive at a pace faster than a crawl in a land where side streets are much wider than driveways!

I first discovered this area in high school when I came out for UMass Band Day. Which made such an impression on me that I just had to attend UMass Amherst so I could be in the band. Then I got here and was too scared to join the band, crazy schedule and commitments were required especially so in the drumline, as I discovered my second semester freshman year into sophomore year. Pictured is the only football game I played in. AND this is the only picture of me the entire game because my Hubs (bf at the time) was taking pictures and the battery died right after this. Figures. The Drumline is a very stressful group to be a part of, and I think more so than the Band itself.

So anyway, this has turned into a long story about how my dialect has changed. If you want to know where yours falls go HERE, which is an abbreviated version of the original survey found HERE. It's too bad that you can't take the full survey anymore, as I did when it came out. It was pretty fun, and pinpointed my accent well. I leave you on my most favorite question in the link as it will always be a bubbler (bubblah) in my book. You can click through the questions and use the map to see where you fall. It's pretty neat!

Over the years I have most definitely lost my SE Mass accent. I do find it slipping out every so often, and when I catch it I gasp slightly, cover my mouth and then apologize about it. I have no idea why, and the people around me are all, "I didn't hear it". But then again my husband doesn't hear the difference between the names Erin and Aaron, so I can't rely on him. It's especially evident when conversing with my family and friends who still live out east.

This whole blog post was written because last night I found myself having an extremely hard time saying the name 'Arthur' in my son's story. He had to overcome some speech issues, so I like to try and say things are properly as possible yet is comfortable for me to say. We say our r's out here. They don't out east, and last night I kept saying "Ahthah" and not "Arthur" and I was getting frustrated with myself, and had to stop. That name should just not be allowed here.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

I'm old and young at the same time, I guess

Alot of the time I feel like I have "old" moments such as forgetting stuff, getting confused easily, making references to culture in my youth and today's young folk have no idea what I'm talking about and have a child turn 10. Then there is the fact Soleil Moon Frye, aka: Punky Brewster, who I know is older than me has children the same age as mine! She's not a peer- She's a role model dammit! or something like that.. It's weird. Also I find men in their 40's attractive such as here, here & here. Sure sign of being old if you ask me. Also such expenditures such as student loans, car payments & mortgages... I can keep adding to the list.

But I'm not old. I'm a mere 33. Still young to most. When people find out my age they say, "oh, you're just a baby!" Thus, whenever I get the chance to say it to someone younger than me, I do too. I really don't like it when they say it to me, b/c I'm in my 30's for crying out loud. Not. A. Baby.

Anyway, I have been finding out recently though, that many other moms who have children in the same age group or younger than mine are 10 years older (or more!) than myself, and I think they are the same age as me. They talk about things they did in 1990 that surprise me, because that year, I was in the 5th grade and 10 years old. This is when I start to feel weird about being a "young mom" because to me, I'm not a young mom, I'm average. My mother was a young mom, and my best friend growing up was even a younger mom at 16 and her mom a grandmother at 32 or something totally crazy young to be a grandmother, seeing as some women don't even start to have babies until their mid-30's. Having a baby in your 40's is an odd thought for me, but very real and often very much desired with some people.

All I know is that when these older moms will be dealing with potty training and the prospects of children hitting puberty, my kids will be old enough to say, "Adios boys, mama is going on a vacation! Don't burn down the house!" Having children when you are on the younger side of the life spectrum is often shunned, but I am thankful I had babies in my younger, more energy filled days where my health is good and I'm not relying on social security just yet.

There are pros & cons to parenting in each age group, but for me, I'm happy about where I am.


Chronically behind the times

It all started when I was a kid in the 80's. We didn't have a lot of money, by any stretch of the means so we often relied on hand me downs from clothes to video games.

We got our first system, an Atari with games from my cousins, when they got the all new Nintendo Entertainment System .

I loved the Atari- my favorite game was Donkey Kong, and also Big Birds Egg Catch. Give me a break guys I was like 6 or 7 when we got it, so it's totally cool you guys. Then when the SNES came out WE inherited the NES.. HOT DOG! That was loads of fun! It also started my mother's addiction to Dr. Mario and the Zelda franchise... It's possible we didn't inherit theirs but got our own, but I don't think so. My mom began this great task of creating her own maps of levels and How-to guides for MANY games. I bet she still has them somewhere too. Many countless hours were played in Dr. Mario on Level 25 (the highest possible level) as it was her downtime. Sidenote: Mom also played using her 1st 2 fingers with her right hand instead of her thumb.

At some point, we acquired the Super Nintendo and we were always a bit behind of everyone else. Even now, I never owned a game cube, and got the Wii like 2 years after it came out and an XBOX360 about a year after that. I am never on the cutting edge of technology. 

Same thing with fashion. I am not sure what triggered my delay in fashion tastes, but I think it's partly because as a mother, my needs always come last last, and by the time I have the money and opportunity to purchase clothing for myself, the styles I liked I can't find. They have come and gone. It's not like I wear anything fancy either. I wear simple stuff cotton shirts and jeans. Now I have a hard time buying stuff because it doesn't fit right. I am wider in areas than I'd like to be, so even if the waste fits, other areas don't fit and my feet are big & wide so as much as I like shoes, I hate shoe shopping- it's very hard to find something that both fits comfortably and the right style for the occasion. It's awful. I think i'd rather get a tooth pulled than shoe shop all the time.
Even my nerd culture is behind the times. My husband has been a fan of Doctor Who
for a very long time and has been trying to get me to watch it for.... pretty much as long as we started dating, and I never did. It was cheesy old British television that I didn't care for. Even when the reboot came out. I didn't get it. I just didn't. It was weird any full of sci-fi stuff I wasn't really into in my twenties. Thie past couple seasons of Matt Smith as the Doctor, got me hooked. I don't know why. I think even though the fans were upset that Tennat was leaving and smith was controversial, I really enjoy his portrayal of the Doctor. Now we are on the cusp of the 50th anniversary of the series. It's coming out in mere DAYS. As a result I have been binge watching Doctor Who (reboot) all fall and watched 4 episodes last night alone o.O . I am at the point where the doctor changes from Tennant to Smith. Even if I can't finish before the special comes out that's okay. I have seen the majority of the episodes with Smith. I have thoroughly enjoyed the timey-wimey adventure the most current doctors and companions.

Also I was late to Twitter, and love it now, and late to Firefly- I became a fan when it came to DVD and didn't even know about it when it was on television. Star Trek, I don't mind. I'm not a big fan of it, but thanks to my husbands escapades of binge watching ALL of the different versions of that series, I don't mind it. He watches so much though, often I just don't want to watch it at all.

The list of things just goes on. What say you, internet? Please tell me I'm not alone!

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Never thought I be so happy to look in my rear view

I have this friend. Had this friend. She's still alive, but I don't see her anymore. It was not my decision to have that be the case. I met her as she was my neighbor for a few years and we became friends quickly as our sons loved to play with each other. I considered her my best friend and felt like I could confide in her in about anything.

We had been close for quite some time, and she is a person attracts not the best men. One particular boyfriend of hers was verbally abusive. While he was staying with her she came down with the swine flu, and after she got somewhat better she realized she needed to leave this guy and called her ex husband to see if he could take care of their son while she was trying to get into a better situation. Long story short, her ex husband decided to not return her son back to her. She ended up moving to Texas to be near them. She had asked me to give her a ride to the airport in the morning and when I stopped by her place she wasn't there. There was no sign of her and I was really upset. I didn't get to say goodbye. I went home and cried int he driveway. She was in Texas for 2 years we kept in touch fairly frequently. Her ex was being an ass and canceling her visits with her son and brainwashing him into thinking the worst of her.

Eventually her ex made it so difficult for her to even talk with her son on the phone let alone have a visit, she left and came back north after 2 years of trying.

We reconnected and were hanging out again and all was well. Sort of. She still attracted weirdos, but whatever, She came onto hard times for a couple of different things, and I was severely worried about her. One thing that is consistent with is that when things get tough, she shuts down and becomes depressed. As a friend I am there for her and to help her.

Well, why am I talking so much about her? Well, she stopped talking to me and wasn't returning my calls or texts. Wait that sounded like I was non stop harassing this person. I wasn't. I was reaching out to her a couple times in a week. I was so worried that one day after work I knocked on her door, she answered and simply said that she didn't want company right now. That's fine. I asked her is she was okay. She said she was and then pretty much shooed me away and shut the door. That was a year ago this fall. Since then I have tried to reach out to her only a few times, one of those times was an email to wish her a happy birthday, and that was all.

I was confused, sad & angry and felt lost. I seemed to have lost my best friend for a reason that I did not know. It really bothered me and I just couldn't shake the feeling of being hurt for unknown reasons. If there was some sort of fight or disagreement atleast there would be an obvious reason.

Then came Thanksgiving. We decided to try and host Thanksgiving at our house for a change. To be at a location comfortable for our kids. A dinner where I could have some leftovers. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It is completely family centered. Thanksgiving for me is being able to spend time with the extended family enjoy a meal relax and have fun. As a kid I loved being able to spend time with my cousins, especially the years when my log distance cousins were there.

So we invited people over and not a single person wanted/could to come. Not. A. Single. One. "We're going to so & so's", "we're gonna eat at home", "I need to feed the hunters", "I don't have a ride", "I have to work". So that was disappointing, but I made the best of it. I made a full on turkey dinner. We ate at the table! Which if you know us, know that this doesn't happen as often as I like. So I made this big wonderful dinner for my family, and then they hardly ate. "I don't like turkey", "I'm not that hungry", "I don't want gravy", "yuck, pie!" (whose kids are these?!)

And after that I was just in a chronic shitty mood. I didn't want anything to do with Christmas and the New Year couldn't come fast enough.

I can't remember when I came out of it, some time around the transition into spring? I don't know

Anyway,

I'm posting this because the other morning, my friend was behind me at a red light near my son's school and it just made me happy to see her knowing that she is still around and appears to be doing well as I have been wondering how she has been doing.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

that "certain age" where your body says F-U

I have been in my 30's now for a couple years and it has been a pretty good run thus far. I don't know why people get so bent out of shape when they turn 30. It's pretty much the same as 29 only different in the sense  of how 29 is different from 28, etc...

I have noticed in the past couple years I suffer from PMS like I never had before. I still get confused by it. Why can I be an instant bitch with zero tolerence, and go into full on must-clean-the-entire-house-while consuming-all-the-chinese-food-and-pizza-in-this-town, 6 hours later. I don't get it....and then I get a headache that I suffer through for a few hours before I realize I can take tylenol for that. Also, what's with the acne moving from my face to my neck? wtf ya'll?

The most recent thing I'm trying to figure out is my love/hate relationship with caffeine.

Here's how  it used to be:
I'm 20 and I can drink all the caffeine I want and still fall asleep at a reasonable hour!
I'm 30 and I can't drink caffeine after 3 otherwise I am up half the night!
I'm 32.5 and I can't drink caffeine after noon otherwise I am up half the night!

That's right folks, I have had insomnia for the last 6+ months or so hit or miss, but sometimes running for several weeks at a time. I think figured out that it's related to my caffeine intake. Now let me just clarify and say that I don't drink obscene amounts of caffeine. An "average" day I would drink a normal size cup -16oz in the morning and sometimes some soda for lunch or at dinner time. Rarely did I drink it all three times, and sometimes, I'd only have my morning cup worth, if at all. so in the last several weeks, maybe a month or so now, I have given up ALL but my morning cup of coffee for caffeine. I have also stopped caffeinated soda as part of the "my body has become sensitive to caffeine" testing trial.(with the exception of this past weekend at my sisters b/c my sleeping got all out of whack anyway- I needed the boost)

Since I have given up the other doses of caffeine I have been falling asleep around or atleast tired enough for sleep around 10/11pm which is waaaay better than the 12:30/1am I have been accustomed to for the last year atleast... especially when one's alarm goes off at 6am to get the rugrats and herself to school and work and make lunch and shower all before we try to leave the house at 7:30 to drop the kids at school. It's no easy feat on a good nights sleep, never mind chronically only getting 5-6 hours of sleep. Trying to catch up on missed sleep on the weekend always ended up in insomnia again by monday because it's like I moved to LA and shifted my sleep schedule by three hours.

I digress, cutting back the caffeine has helped significantly in terms of ability to fall asleep. I however still drag during some afternoons and get into a zombie like state, which isn't good when I'm driving and the whole reason why I would have the afternoon boost. This hasn't happened recently or often or while driving so that's okay I guess.

Tonight though, I am tired.. as in it's only 8 'clock and I could fall asleep right now, but instead my kids are going crazy and I'm Skyping with my sister, tired.